Again, I'm at the tail end of the reviewers. Unfortunately, I was involved in the Project From Hell at work, and basically worked all weekend and slept through Monday. I noticed from the previous reviews already posted, it seems like there were a variety of interpretations of many of the events in "Who's Gurkhan," so if you need another two dinars' worth, read on....

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As we've heard before, TPTB have said they want to try and recapture some of the "old" Xena this season, and we've seen a variety of old plot devices recycled (usually to new effect) this season. This week, we are treated to a sort of combination of "Return of Callisto" (where Gabrielle's desire for revenge leads her to the brink of murder) and "When In Rome" (where Gabrielle denies any desire for murder, but her passive actions result in people being beheaded). Also, the slave plot was similar to a couple of the Xena comics of late, but perhaps that's stretching the idea of influences a bit. Besides, what slave girl plot doesn't go like this one on any movie or TV show? But I didn't get the feeling of "been there, done that." Rather, the plot devices, which are proven crowd pleasers, were used in combination to tell a different tale. After all, these are not the same characters they were in the aforementioned episodes. Or are they? Is Gabrielle any different now than when she couldn't kill Callisto when given the opportunity? Can the newly minted warrior bard take down the mighty Gurkhan in cold blood? And therein lies the difference in this story. It's no longer about "can she?" (since we've seen her kill repeatedly by now) but "will she?" (use her warrior skills in the service of base vengeance).

We know we're in trouble right from the get-go. Gabrielle (looking damn fine in her new red outfit and slightly longer hair) is positively bouncing with joy as she enters Potidaea, looking forward to seeing her (much older) family again. But Eve is smiling, so we know something really bad is coming up! If Eve is happy, something's got to be wrong since she hardly ever does that! Why Gabrielle and Xena think everything they left at their homes will be the same when they return after twenty five years is beyond me, but they do.

It was nice seeing Lila again, but I didn't think she looked old enough. But at least they didn't pancake her with lots of old age makeup. But you could tell from her troubled expression she was going to be dropping some bad news on them. I was a bit surprised she was listed in the opening credits, however, since she really was only on-screen for a couple of minutes; but I guess she's a Xena "regular" now.

I agree with whoever said Gabrielle way over reacted at the news of her family's deaths. She would normally cry, then try to figure out how to rescue her niece while bringing on Gurkhan's rightful downfall. When she runs out screaming about wanting vengeance, I was a little surprised. Just then, a crackle of thunder and a wall of rain hits. C'mon, guys, isn't that a bit of overkill? But, Gabrielle's reaction is the fuel that kicks off the episode, so we'll go with it: Gab's pissed and not going to take it any more. Now if she only had an actual plan....

Any thoughts I had about Gabrielle not having the stomach for it were dispelled, rightly or wrongly, by seeing her practice with her sais on the boat trip over. She had that same hard look she had just before she decimated that Roman legion in "Ides of March." Sends chills up my spine when she looks like that. "Today I'm not an assassin, but tomorrow...." Then she goes and pukes. Sounds like the violence might not be agreeing with her, but I wonder what happened to the little "tap your wrist" trick? (Guess the writers forgot that?)

I saw several people wonder why Eve and Xena refer to their ability to kill in cold blood as "a gift." Well, to most people, it's not. But to a warrior, it would ease a lot of your guilt. Of course, not being Livia any more, Eve probably doesn't consider it something she'll need again, either. Minor point in semantics, but perhaps they also consider the gift more the fact they don't let a cold-blooded killing eat them up afterwards. They can put it in perspective because it's just part of their "job." If you get a chance to kill, say, Callisto, in cold blood, you take the opportunity, or she'll cause more suffering for more people later. A warrior just has to do this sometimes. Imagine if they couldn't handle the guilt? Xena'd be totally insane by now, without the Furies' help. Yes, I'd say it's a "gift."

Up until now, it seems Virgil's been a fine, upstanding young man. Here, he finally begins to show traces of Joxer. I distinctly saw Ted Raimi's face when Xena grabbed him by the cheeks to get him to comply with her plans. "Good idea!" he concedes.

Of course, unlike Ted would probably do, Virgil gets Xena back in the comical scene at the slave market, when he scrunches up Xena's face as he shows her off. He knows she can't react, and seeing her hold back in several scenes of duress is really hilarious (except in the torture scene later, in which it's rather disturbing watching what she'll go through for Gabrielle's vengeance).

In the first of many scenes aimed at the teen male market (to say nothing of the 40-year-old male market), Xena shows flesh as she is disrobed for the slave trader. Again, Xena must hold back, and the way she sucks in her lower lip is just hilarious! Virgil gets an eyeful, and even after she gives him a stop-looking-right-now! glance, he still gazes on with his jaw hanging open. Must be quite a sight!

It didn't have anything to do with anything, but I loved the jaded female slave who felt that being Gurkhan's slave would be a step up from the dump she came from. Gotta like anyone who can find the silver lining in that! Too bad she didn't run into a Xena-like figure and become her sidekick. It worked for Gab!

The slave purchasing scene was quite clever. Gurkhan plants decoys around the room to bid for him so he can't be identified in public. As much as I love seeing Xena get the goods on the bad guys, I loved the panicked look she got upon realizing that she couldn't identify Gurkhan. Even her plans aren't always perfect, and now we were going to see her have to improvise. And with Gabrielle's arrival soon, the variables would become even more complex. And the ending was brilliant, with the slaver's auctioning going faster and faster, and Xena's eyes darting from one face to another in a vain attempt to figure all this out. You could feel her claustrophobia! ("Are you bidding sir, or are you just picking your nose? Well, stop it!" Ha, ha!)

Of course, when Gabrielle awakes, after being drugged by Xena earlier (what are friends for?), she goes after. Yes, there are some things that never change. And since Gabrielle is not part of Xena's plan, only trouble can be brewing here. At this point, Virgil and Gabrielle pretty much leave Eve behind for the rest of the show. Too bad. We've had numerous chances to see Xena and Gabrielle dancing seductively of late (including later this very EP). Let's give Eve a chance to shake it, too! Maybe next week??? Then again, less whining this way!

I liked seeing Xena come in with the bang-less look again. We last saw this back in India, and it gives her a nicer, more open faced look. Nice change of pace, but of course, the bangs are the thing.

I noticed several people note that when "Number One Wife" entered, they knew immediately it was Sarah. In hindsight, it's obvious to me, too, but I have to admit, I was so overcome with all the beautiful, scantily-clad women, it didn't really occur to me. However, from the nasty way she treated Xena, you knew something was going to happen to her before the hour's over. The kick to Xena's face and "bad dog" admonition only sealed her fate! Again, we see Xena hold back when you knew she just wanted to mop the floor with the bitch!

Again, there are shades of the past as Gabrielle gains entrance to a harem by selling herself into slavery, just as she previously got into a jail by getting herself arrested in, I believe it was, "The Black Wolf." However, I was quite delighted with her quirky belly dance she performs for Gurkhan. Unlike Xena, who dances with a feline grace and sensuality, Gabrielle moves in small increments and in a very angular fashion. She strikes short poses with her arms in exotic positions, moves in jerky rhythms across the floor, and quickly breaks from one move to another. Xena moves in the unbroken line of a person letting the moment slide into the next. Gabrielle, ever the thinker, tends to construct her dance logically, and you can almost see her trotting out each move, laying it on Gurkhan, and then immediately going to the next part. And if what she does with her upper body seems logical and controlled, once she starts rocking her hips back and forth, she lets you know she's still tuned into the rhythm of the music. Oh, man, I just really got off on this scene! The humorous moment when Xena catches Virgil watching Gabrielle a little too closely is a nice lighter touch. Again, this season they are back to doing the humor mixed with the drama again, to very good effect. Another point for the writers!

Well, Xena may be having troubles with her original plan, but when she sees the glint of light on Gabrielle's dagger, she shows again her uncanny knack to improvise in a pinch. She grabs the dagger before anyone realizes it came from Gabrielle, then concocts a good story to cover up the assassination attempt ("She won't have Gurkhan before me," said like a girl who really wants to be the new Number One Wife). I thought her hitting Gabrielle hard enough to knock her unconscious was a bit much, but she probably knew Gabrielle would say something wrong to throw the whole plan into chaos. And seeing what Xena had to go through as punishment--well, Gabrielle got off easy with a knot on her head!

The torture scenes were, again, pretty brutal for TV. Just like the more graphic battle scenes, we seem to be upping the violence factor this last year or so. Seeing Xena hanging upside down, her eye swollen beyond recognition, her body bruised all over, blood pooling on the ground below her, was simply horrible. Even the scenes where she is being mercilessly beaten had the almost physical punch of the fight scenes in "Raging Bull."

I found it rather ironic that Xena sees visions of Gabrielle which seem to be giving her the strength to go on. If it weren't for Gabrielle busting in on things, Xena'd still be out taking a nice bath in the harem quarters. Perhaps she was itching to get back and give Gab a good whack upside the head! Knock some sense into her! Just kidding. But I'll bet Gabrielle felt pretty darned guilty when she saw Xena return all beaten and bloody. Relieved, but guilty! And how is Xena? "Peachy," the warrior survivor understates!

It's interesting how Xena now wants to let Gabrielle do the actual killing. Does she figure as long as Gabrielle is here, why not let her do it? It was her idea in the first place. Or does she have the hunch that perhaps Gabrielle will learn something from a confrontation with murder? Perhaps she knows Gabrielle won't be able to go through with it (as Eve predicts earlier), and once Gabrielle realizes this herself, maybe she'll be more comfortable with her warrior role. That is, she'll know she hasn't become a cold-blooded killer, and that to her, there are lines drawn where death is not the answer. They didn't really go into that in this episode, but from rumors I've heard, perhaps there will be echoes of this later in the season. But at this point, I think seeing Xena get beaten up has pretty much filled her stomach for violence. Even though she says, "Thank you" to Xena's offer, she sounds like she's starting to have doubts about her quest, and her eyes dart about unsurely.

I noticed that in the next scene, Xena and Gabrielle are caught playing with the hookah. Wonder what they're smoking in there? Nut bread perhaps? I guess nobody had invented rolling papers yet.

I've already discussed Xena's dancing above, and she puts her talents to good use in her dance for Gurkhan. Again, Gurk is smoking something in a pipe. How do I get on this show? But man is Xena looking hot! That exotic dark makeup looks good on her, to say nothing of the cool jewelry all over the place. I think Lucy just gets better looking each year (of course, so does Renee, but that's another story). Something about a sexy woman dressed all in black (in the areas in which she actually is dressed)! Gabrielle didn't move her tummy much when she danced, but here, Xena's got that belly button on the move! Women must have muscles there men just don't have!

When Xena finishes dancing and requests Sarah's head on a plate, I was surprised. I thought they were here to rescue her, not kill her. But then I thought, this is Xena. She's obviously got a plan, the first part of which is to simply flush out Sarah by any means possible. And just before Sarah is unveiled, it suddenly occurred to me: gotta be Wife Number One. I was slow on that one, OK?

And the way Xena offered Gurkhan a threesome in order to get Gabrielle into the action was great. What guy would pass that up? From the look on Gabrielle's face when she walks in, I think it took her a minute to realize what was going on. But she looked determined. Gurkhan is lying there, helpless after Xena's pinch. Will she or won't she? As with Callisto, she holds up the knife, but can't bring herself to kill a helpless person. I thought she would just get up and leave him be. But I liked the way she still beat the crap out of the scumbag. That's for her family! My old therapist would approve.

I found Sarah's sudden conversion to goodness a bit much, but as she struggles to pull away from Gabrielle, ashamed at her actions in the harem, Gab just keeps telling her that nobody blames her for what she had to do. Gabrielle can be quite good at bonding with people, so I guess it's understandable. Xena's look, as she watches this, is slightly more inscrutable. At first, she appears to be merely watching, but as she watches Sarah break down, I think she suddenly understands what prompted Sarah to act so brutally earlier, and by the end, she looks about ready to cry with compassion. Then she sort of shakes it off, almost like she's thinking, "Darn, I wanted to really pay her back for the dog remark, but now she's all good and all!" Well, I imagine it looked like that!

One thing I wasn't clear on. It appeared they were going to use Gurkhan as a hostage ("There's a loophole in the system") to get out of the fortress. So if they used Gurkhan to get out, didn't the guards see them and refrain from attacking since he was a hostage. If so, how did Gurkhan get back in the dungeon, and why were his soldiers at this point worried about killing Sarah when their boss had just been abducted? The only thing I can figure is, they made Gurkhan show them a secret exit, then they put him back in the cell before they escaped. Still, this wasn't clear from the episode as presented. Am I missing something?

But the upshot of it is, Gurkhan is beheaded, almost exactly as happened in "When In Rome," and I'm sure Gabrielle knew that would happen when she left him there. She can't pull the trigger, but she somehow finds it alright to allow someone else to do her dirty work. In some ways, I almost think it would've been more honest of her to simply kill Gurkhan in the bedroom originally.

On the ship home, Sarah wonders how her mother could possibly still love her after what she's done. "You don't know mothers very well, do you?" Eve says. Xena smiles. Gabrielle tells her, "Boy, are you ever in the right company!" Yes, it's quite a forgiving crowd here.

Well, I'd have to give this episode a four and a half chakram rating. I deduct a half chakram for lack of originality (as I said, it recycled old plot devices relentlessly). But it was a good solid hour of Xena, with much of the flavor of a season one or two episode--dramatic, but with dashes of humor. The old Xena/Gabrielle/Joxer dynamic was recreated by having Virgil display a bit more of Joxer's characteristics, and Eve was pretty much left behind for most of the action, so she wasn't around to whine and clutter up the action. I didn't find Gurkhan to be a particularly good villain, but he was a victim of the plot device. He was mysterious early on, not knowing who he was, but that meant we didn't get to really zoom in on his character. And once Xena finally got to him in the bedroom, he was surprisingly easy to defeat. But overall, I think this is the most solid hour of this still new season. But I loved the action in the harem in general, and the belly dancing heroines specifically.
Rick(Gabriologist since the late 20th Century)
Visit my web site at ricks-studio.com for Episode Reviews,
Humorous Quotes, and other Xena-themed writing!

"Do you have to keep hitting me on the head, Xena?" --Gabrielle
"How else would I knock you out?" --Xena
"Which brings up another thing...." --Gabrielle