Rick's Studio

We finally get a new episode! The fact this signals the final wind-down to the end of the season, well...at least we know it's going to be quite a ride, based on the rumors going around. Let me just say right off, this episode dealt very, very loosely with the actual Antony and Cleopatra story, and I don't think it would do much good pointing out the historical inaccuracies here. With Xena, bending the truth to fit a whopping good story has always been justification enough! So let's get on with the story as reinvented by Tapert and Company:

So, Gina Torres was not going to play Cleo here? Seeing as how Xena would have to impersonate her, perhaps that was a good thing. Both beautiful in their own right, they don't look very similar! And what about the poor actress that gets the Cleopatra role? "You mean I die before the opening credits? But I'm Cleopatra!" At least she got a good milk bath out of the deal!

Call me predictable, but I just love these type of Egyptian stories. Something about the architecture and the costumes I just love. This was one beautiful episode in so many ways! The opening scene in Cleo's bath was so well shot, and of course Xena and Gabrielle in Egyptian costumes were quite deliciously gorgeous. Gabrielle's handmaiden outfit may be my all time favorite not-her-regular-outfit outfit.

Then again, Xena wearing nothing but chains, rolling out of a carpet, may be my all time favorite Xena not-her-regular-outfit outfit! Unfortunately, Xena saying just before this that she was going to "become Egypt" kind of ruined the surprise. You knew who was going to be rolling out! But the look on Xena's face as she announced herself as "queen of Egypt and slave of Rome" was frightening. When Xena looks focused like that, she's not ready to take any sh__ off anybody, and people will be dead before all's said and done.

Xena left Eve with her mother? Is this the first totally baby-free episode since the birth? I believe so! Apparently, Xena's not worried about her mother defending Eve from all the vengeful gods out looking for her. I wouldn't want to be Xena's mom!

Loved the way Xena dropped her key into Antony's mouth. Actually, this is how Houdini used to escape--his wife was his assistant, and she kissed him for luck just before his escape trick. At that point, she passed him the key. Guess they swiped that idea from Xena as well. Why are the history books so quiet regarding the Warrior Princess when she was so influential?

It seems that after learning how to lead Ares around by the 'nads to get her way, she's decided to do the same to the Roman leaders. And, like Ares, who tried to live up to his part of the bargain, only to be tripped up by a technicality, Antony falls in love with Cleo/Xena, only to taste her sword at the end. No wonder Xena's not married yet!

Seeing Brutus' look of shock at seeing Gabrielle alive was a hoot! I'm sure he'd gotten reports back of X&G's deaths, but here she was! And looking hot to boot! I notice she gets the bare-midriff version of the outfit. And then when she tells Brutus he should've been at her crucifixion, well, touché! Makes the final battle scene even more poignant, but we'll get to that. Poor Brutus--he never seems to be quite fully aware of what's going on around him!

I wasn't real fond of seeing Xena transformed into a moony-eyed girl with a crush, but she's always had a thing for powerful, dangerous, and handsome men, and Antony certainly fit the bill. And that laid the ground for some excellent scenes of flirtation that may be second only to some of Ares' work earlier this season. Antony and Xena certainly look great together, and the actors play well off each other. And, as usual, Gabrielle gets right to the point with the pithy quote of the week: "Are you going to flirt him to death?" And then, after hearing Xena's plan, the young Egyptian girl just shakes her head in total disbelief! Even at their most dramatic, those small flashes of humor like diamonds in the sand. It's not like Xena to let her hormones get the best of her, but maybe she's still a bit off kilter from the whole pregnancy.

Security at the Cleopatra compound seems to be quite weak! Ocatavius sneaks right into her bedroom, and then somebody gets close enough to her private chambers to toss numerous fire bombs in and get away without being caught.

I'm sorry, but I just can't approve of using Natalie Merchant on the soundtrack! It was so totally out of keeping with the show (remember their rule about no modern fabrics allowed?), I found myself distracted from what was supposed to be a hot scene of Xena and Antony eating fruit and honey. Surely LoDuca could've come up with some sort of sensual period Egyptian music? Nothing against the song itself, but it just didn't belong here. It totally ruined the mood. I was expecting Draco to jump in at any minute and do "Always Something There To Remind Me"!

It was kind of sad they didn't have more for Gab to do. Seems like through most of the show, until the final battle, she just follows Xena around acting as chaperone. Her main job was telling Xena to take a cold shower at various points!

There was a nice scene about half-way through where Xena and Gabrielle get a few moments alone. They discuss their plan, how things are changing (Antony apparently really loves Xena, Octavius isn't such a bad guy), and what they can do about it. The rapport between our heroines was strong, and it was an excellent example of how the two work together to plan strategy now, rather than having Xena do it all (and usually leaving Gabrielle slightly in the dark).

Clueless Brutus gets another shock--Cleopatra is Xena! Amazing the poor guy didn't just have a nervous breakdown right then and there! It's amazing how power has transformed this well-meaning guy into just another blood thirsty warrior. Brutus says "I crossed the Rubycon of blood," Gabrielle says "I lost my blood innocence." By the last set of commercials, I was smelling a blood bath a-comin'.

The final shipboard battle was brilliant! Having the fighting at night made for a much more atmospheric look, and the scenes of the boats colliding, the prow of the one crashing through the hull of the other, were quite well done, although looking just a bit like the computer animation they probably were (another reason to "hide" behind the night?). But it was better than seeing that same old ship they always use pulled out again! And once again, they don't shy away from the more brutal aspects of the fight, with plenty of blood flowing everywhere and gruesome squishy sword impaling sounds.

But nothing prepared me for seeing Brutus beat the tar out of Gabrielle! His second blow to the face sent blood flying through the air, and I was utterly horrified! After he kicks her in the face after she falls, I was surprised she wasn't unconscious, much less with the strength to lift a sword and give Brutus his payback! But that look on her face as she sees Brutus drooling blood would've chilled even Xena! No yoga karma stupid girl here--this woman is all warrior!

Seems like Antony could've defeated Xena, but he let his emotions get away from him! It isn't until he starts lunging at her with total abandon that she gets around his guard, but perhaps at that point he wanted to die!

And one final surprise: Xena leaves Egypt in the hands of Octavius. Well, you could tell that was coming from early on, but with Xena's Roman experiences, I'm surprised she'd feel comfortable with any Roman in charge. Look what a cad it turned Brutus into! But, there were probably no other options. Rome was so powerful, Egypt simply had to play the game because it couldn't afford to ignore the world's most powerful empire.

So, we get another great episode! Not a perfect episode, but a good solid job. This had all the trappings of a "classic" Xena episode, with the exotic locales, historical personages, sweeping epic stories, etc. we expect from this show. I loved the dashing Antony, the weasely Brutus, and the usual great job by Lucy and Renee. I thought they were going to make a little Egypt arc out of this trip, but I guess next week they're back in Greece. My, how these women get around! So the season was a little wobbly starting off, it has been redeemed with some truly great episodes lately. Long live Xena!